Dating

black_datingI love to date. I like to meet up with an attractive woman I’m really into. I like the nervous feeling I get when I see her, all dolled up and a little nervous about how things might go. Some people are mortified by going out with someone they are interested in. They fear the person judging them or making themselves look like a total fool but let me reassure you, we all play the fool for love so honestly there is nothing to fear. I have three rules to dating that guarantee that both I and my date will have a great time. The rules are totally flexible and  can be modified for your dating purpose but they are pretty much universal. The best thing is, it takes the guess work out of whether I’m going to enjoy myself or not. Let’s be honest nothing is worse than spending time planning a date, then going on the date and everything going totally wrong and believe me I’ve had some pretty incredible mishaps. Are you ready for Nikolai Constantine’s 3 Rules to Successful Dating? Here we go…

Rule #1 is Be Yourself. Honesty is the best policy and it ensures that neither you or your date develop expectations that could result in disappointments if your expectations aren’t met. For example, if you don’t make a ton of money, don’t try to impress your date with super pricey restaurants and dining excursions. Instead pick a quaint bistro with great foods and a friendly atmosphere. Do a bit of homework and check out  a review site like Yelp.com to see what the best drinks and food are and how people rate the service. Also, talk about things you like and have an interest in. If you’re a girl who’s into Netflix Originals, then talk about that the last one you really enjoyed. NIK TIP: when you are thinking about what to pick to talk about to a guy, don’t just dive into super feminine subject matter because it is typically a huge turn off for men. My advice is to test the waters by keeping the conversation light and fun until you find a topic that you are both passionate about. It ensures you can both participate and be present to each other in the exchange as well as both have wiggle room in a conversation incase a topic touches a “soft spot”.

Rule #2 Be Respectful. Be respectful to your date, to the people you encounter and, of course, to yourself. Being respectful to your date ensures that you set a good foundation for communication and sets both you and your date at ease. Little things like turning off the ringer and putting away your phone goes a long way to show you know how to live and be present to the people in your life. Being respectful to others you encounter ensures that outside factors don’t negatively influence an otherwise great date. Men and women alike will also judge a person by how they speak to waitstaff, taxi drivers, or friends they may run into in the street. Let’s face it, no one likes a guy or girl who’s rude to a waiter or hostess. It shows a lack of good sense. Being respectful to yourself simply means to make sure you carry yourself with decency. Let me be clear, this does not mean to let people walk all over you! It means that you would carry yourself in a way that wouldn’t embarrass you or your date. It shows you have a bit of class and know how to handle everyday situations.

Rule #3 Enjoy yourself. Sometimes everything goes exactly as planned and you have a great time without a great degree of effort will ensure that even if the date goes as perfectly as planned, you have a great time. For example, I once took a date to one of my favorite sushi spots to find out she was allergic to fish. She was such a sweetheart she was scared to say anything but I picked up on the vibe that she was bit uncomfortable. I just outright asked her, hey you feel a little uncomfortable, are you ok? She hesitates and then says hey I know you really like this place but I am extremely allergic to seafood. I was obviously in a bit of a pickle but I smiled and said let’s get out of here then. there wasn’t anything else close by except a diner style burger joint so we went there and you know what we had a great time. She got BBQ sauce and mustard on her cocktail dress but her and I are friends to this day. This experience showed me even if you go out on a date and things go wrong or you realize that the person isn’t for you, you may find that you can still have a great time and even make a great friend. Who knows,  you might find someone you know might be a better fit.

I know these rules may sound fairly old fashioned, but I assure you Constantine’s 3 Rules to Dating are a sure fire way to have a good time under most circumstances. If for any reason you use the 3 Rules fail, it means that you need to end the date and get the hell out of there! Seriously though, these rules should make dating a little easier. Let me know if you have any ideas or stories about these too. have fun Lovers!

Ladies, if you need a little practice or you need a date short notice for a special event, contact me and let’s talk about it.

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